Its my 3rd night, 3rd week of Capoeira.

I got home a few hours ago, currently drinking beer. I heard alcohol loosens the muscles - maybe its just a lame excuse, I don't know.

I studied other martial arts before; I did a little weapons training, did a little kickboxing, did a little boxing and Egyptian boxing.

It was fun, I learned a lot of moves which was what everyone wants, I think. I pretty much can handle myself when need be and I am very experience too, I grew up in rough neighbourhood and I learned that sometimes its best to intimidate people than going into a fight with them.

That is why when I walk on the streets no one tends to 'fuck around' with me!!! Its a skill!

For a couple of years I have been ignoring myself physically. Also, I have been training my taste buds, meaning, I have been eating a lot! I don't really regret it, I had a good time, food can be a good best friend!

So imagine an athlete... he stopped working out, sits in front of a computer all day long, and loves food! Imagine if he kept that for 4 years!!! Guess what? That's right, I became out of shape...

I realised this when people started pointing out the extra weight I put on. Some people jokes about it, rubbing my belly as if I was pregnant, Some people just points it out explicitly and uncensored, and some are just so polite, they say "...you know... you should eat more fruits..."

I am a student of Personal Development, so instead of blaming the environment, or blaming my chef, or blaming weather or what have you, I take responsibility!

I decided that the best way to lose the extra weight I put on is to do sports or martial arts. I chose sports first; basketball, my beloved game, but it didn't seem to work. Well, I have couple of reasons, I am currently living in England, basketball isn't really loved by many here. I played with a few people I met on the court, but this didn't happen often, it isn't fun playing all by myself! Also, the nearest court in my house, is an outdoor court - very rough, and again because I currently live in England, the cold winds doesn't allow me to sweat. Well those were my reason, but I don't know, maybe I am just making excuses!

But I learned a few things from my short comeback in the basketball court, and that is... I tend to push myself I little further when I am playing with other people (which again, I really didn't get to do often), which could mean that if I have other people that makes me want to move, I can definitely push myself a little bit further.

Keeping that in mind, taking up martial arts seemed like a reasonable solution. (Just to remind you guys the main objective here is to lose weight!)

So I was searching for martial arts that would best suit my needs, but I had a few limitations, I really did not want to travel that far for several reasons, it has to be somewhere close by, and, there shouldn't be any fat practitioner of that martial arts, because if there is, then its not really good for loosing weight is it? I am not going to give examples, but don't get my wrong guys, your martial arts could be lethal, but remember, my objective is to lose weight.

Suddenly, I realised, the best martial arts for me is Capoeira, I have played Tekken 3 as a teenager, so I know what Eddy Gordo does! But, I had to make sure, so I searched Google and YouTube for "Fat Capoeirista" (or something like that) and there wasn't any... so it must be intense! - Its decided! Capoeira is for me!

I still remember my first night, I was waiting outside the the Capoeira venue with the other students and for some reason there is a 'prison bar door' just outside the main door. One guys explained the reason why there is a 'prison bar door' is to prevent the beginners, like me, from escaping once the lesson starts! My first night... I almost died! But like what they say "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger..." I survived and a few hours ago was my 3rd night, 3rd week of doing Capoeira so I can pretty much say I am getting stronger...

Capoeira is intense, I originally wanted to do Capoeira to get into shape... I should have expected more...

We have a Temporary Master so he has a different style of teaching, I learned a lot from him and enjoyed his lesson even though I felt like dying... To me, the technique that I remembered the most was the 'Cabeçada', or headbutt as well call it! There are many ways you can use the Cabeçada, even if you are an amateur, you will look half way decent if you use Cabeçada. Our teacher explained that Cabeçada can be used anytime whenever you see an opportunity!

At the end of the class our teacher asked us to sit in a circle and he explained to us briefly what Capoeira means to him and how we can apply Capoeira to make our life better.

Unfortunately, only a few people turned up maybe its because our original master is currently in Brazil (doing some Capoeira related stuff), but he mentioned that it isn't really the number of people, but the atmosphere those people gave, and I am proud to say that the atmosphere was really good! He explained that to him, Capoeira is about 'having fun', it has to be fun! Also, in Capoeira there are moves like the Cabeçada, where you need the right opportunity to use it properly. He mentioned that being a Capoeirista you should learn how to look for opportunities and once these opportunities reveal themselves, exploit them! He continued by saying that we should do this in our life as well - I know I know, that is an un-trivial and un-interesting piece of lesson, but you see, even though most people know this already, they don't really do it... why? I don't know! But if you keep this in mind, then maybe the opportunity you are seeking will finally reveal itself, and when this happens, you better exploit it!!!

This experience to me I think is unique because all I expected from Martial Arts like Capoeira, are the moves and becoming fit. To listen to a teacher express what Capoeira means to him, listen to the philosophy that drives Capoeira and how to use Capoeira as a way of life... that is a whole new level!

In the Swiss Alps Mountains, people would set out on an expedition to reach the summit. It literally takes a day to get to the top of the mountain and half way up the mountain was a house they call ‘The Half Way House’.

So people start early in the morning and by about noon they reach The Half Way House.

They walk into this house and the fire was roaring from a beautiful fireplace and the chef would make everyone a good hot soup, and all the good stuffs that just taste so good.

In the house there is a lounge room area with a piano and nice soft chairs where they could rest, eat and be physically re-nourished before they go on top of the mountain.

So the people would settle in for a bit, they would start to eat, begin to laugh and enjoy themselves, but, at the end of the meal when the rest of the people are ready to go up the mountain you could see the change that happens to most the people.

Many of them would say, “…you know what… we'll just wait here… we're just going to settle in here and enjoy this…”.

As people took off they waved at the people who decided to stay and say, “See ya!!! Its good to be with ya!!!”

So the people that stayed played some cards and some games, but, at about 3:30pm or 4:00pm, something always happens to the people who stayed in the half way house… without fail, they would go over to the large picture window and they would start to look where their friends were…

And the atmosphere of the room went from frivolity and laughter to all of a sudden… seriousness…

Without saying a word all of a sudden everyone who stayed behind recognised and realised something... they knew that what they have set out to achieve that morning they were not going to accomplish…

I think that is so true in life.

People set a goal and then decide that they are not going to go all the way. They settle in The Half Way House - the average lifestyle… and in The Half Way House they to take it a little bit easier and have fun…

…And in that whole process they never reach success… because they didn’t do the extra effort, they didn't pay the price… they settled for average… they settled in The Half Way House.

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup,
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out--
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

I remember as a little kid... I loved video games!!!

'Family Computers' came out, it was the best thing then. I still remember my favourite game were:

• Islander - I love this game!
• Super Mario Bros - Classic!
• Bomber Man
• Battle City - its a tank battle where you have to protect the eagle crest and defeat enemies!
• B-Wings
• and a lot more!!!

A couple of years later I owned a 'Playstation' which we now call 'PS1'. This was so much better! Definitely!

I had a lot of favourite games! I mean a lot!

• Metal Gear Solid - I loved the story its was amazing, some parts of it are sad - if you played the game  you'll understand.
• Tekken 3 - I'm so good at this game, I could pretty much use anyone. My favourite player has to be Jin, he is like the combination of Hwaorang and Paul - for amateurs don't bother, you wouldn't understand...
• Tomba 2 - This game, is really good! I originally wanted 'Tomba 1' but I was not able to find one, so I bought Tomba 2 instead! I still remember one evening, I decided to finally finish the game so I stayed up most of the night... even though I know I have to wake up early that morning... guess what happened? I fainted!...
• Legend of Legaia - This game as to be my favourite. The best RPG in the world! Excellent Story! I did not actually see the ending of this game, but my friends did... using my memory card!
• Tenchu: Stealth Assassins - This game was given to me by a friend... and I love it!!! Thanks Oliver!!!
• and a lot more!!!

I still remember my Dad, some of my friends and a couple of my teachers saying that playing video games will make you dumber - whatever! And they also told me that I will not learning anything 'useful' in them - maybe not!

The reason why I am writing right now, is because I did learn something... I did learn invaluable lessons playing video games.

To be honest with all you guys, I have lost interest in video games and all those sort! But not completely!

In my phone I have 'Project Gotham Racing', its actually an excellent game! At first I did not like it because it was really hard to control the car, but once you start to be more skilled, you will start to enjoy it. For PGR newbies if you are having trouble taking a hard turn, try using the breaks then drift, proper timing and concentration is essential for a perfect-non-time-waster turn!

Let me share the trick I used from becoming ranked as one of the top 700 to becoming ranked as one of the top 200 in less than a week!

Two words: 'Kudos Combo'

Go check my ranking, my nickname is SWAY

You guys probably already noticed that your ranking does not depend on your speed, how much money you have or whatever, its is determined through Kudos Points.

We can get Kudos Points by drifting, drafting, overtake, jump in the air, slide at finish, and probably a few more than that. But... if you do all these in quick succession, instead of gaining Kudos Points by doing them individually, they will be multiplied to each other!!! Thus the term KUDOS COMBO!!!

Before I discovered this, I play each game and earn around 4,000 Kudos Points... Now each game I play earns around 70,000 Kudos Points!!!

Here's what you do, the very first time you earn Kudos Points, maybe through overtake, keep pressing (you don't have to hold) the drift buttons, do it every second! And if you do this for the rest of the game, all your Kudos Points from drifting, drafting, air, overtake, and many more... will be piled up together as a Kudos Combo! Tada!

But... if you hit the walls really hard, or if you bump into another car, or if another car bumps into you, most of the time, you will be 'Wasted' and this is bad, because if this happens it means that all the Kudos Combo you have been piling will disappear completely!!!

And this can get your frustrated!!! annoyed!!! and would make you want to destroy your phone!!! Specially if you really did a careful driving and a few feet from the finish line another car bumps into you and makes you wasted!!! All those Kudos Combo you have been piling will disappear... for good!!!

But there is a positive side to it... it trains you... it trains you to start all over gain and handle the emotions that takes place when you get 'wasted'. You see, most of the people in life when they fail, they find it hard to deal with the emotions that takes place inside them, it literally FUCKS THEM UP!!! and makes them give up!!!

The next lesson is the perseverance, determination, and the value of visualisation... the first time I thought of using Kudos Combo in a race, I literally failed a million times. I got 'wasted' every few seconds, that I have to restart!!! In fact, I failed so many times, my fingers can press the necessary buttons automatically in sequence to restart the game.

But I knew this was possible and I knew I could do it, so I tried and tried, until finally, I got the hang of it! And you can imagine how I felt winning my first race and have all the Kudos Points piled as a Kudos Combo...

That's right... very delighted...

Final Lesson:

Just yesterday, I signed up for this 'multi-player online role-playing game' called Rappelz. Its free, but obviously you have to download the software (or client as they call it) to play.

The software is more than 1 GB! it takes around 7 hours to download.

Well, I downloaded a zip file, and left my computer ON all night so I can download it, but I was pissed off to find that the Zip File I downloaded was corrupted!!!

So, I am downloading it again... I went to 'download.com' and its pretty good because you can download the '.EXE' directly, they did not put it in a zip file like that other Website!!!

I don't know about you guys, but I like reading reviews from people that downloaded it. And one of the guys said something like this...

"...I was concentrating more on increasing my level, instead of enjoying the game..."

That statement hit me pretty hard... believe it or not, that is the game we play in life.

Some people concentrates more on gaining success but forgets to enjoy life! While others enjoys life but forgets about gaining success...

And it dawned on me... I have been concentrating on becoming successful and often I lose out on the fun. But if I concentrate on the fun... I might lose out on success...

I think there should be balance... what do you think?

I know, I know... I have not written in my beloved blog for a while. I have not finished it as well.

I have been really busy doing something else, I wanted to write something inspirational, something helpful to people, but nowadays, it seems those ideas doesn't flow out of me naturally anymore.

I have been focusing on starting a business, I have become ruthless and cold! - Hope not too much.

Now that I have mentioned that, that is probably why... that is probably why I have been having a lot of bad dreams lately...

You see, I have done some brain exercises which makes my brain more active even when I sleep, and for some reason all my dreams are not just ordinary dreams, they are lucid! Meaning - I can control myself in my dream! Not only that... most my dreams are grotesque... urgh! And the worst part is... my dreams feel so real and wakes me up! Sometimes in the middle of the night!

And then I say to myself... "phew... its only a dream.. thank god!"

Like I said, I have been having a lot of these dreams lately and that is why I finally decided to write them down.

It has been said that dreams comes from your subconscious and bad dreams must mean bad subconscious!

My dream last night went something like this...

It was early in the morning... I can see myself sleeping in a messy big bed, it has books, shoes, bean bag, you name it! Suddenly it dawned on me that last night my face had a few pimples. I got pissed of about it so I washed it off thoroughly - Hardcore!

Finally, the day light entered my window to wake me up!

I'm tired, but what's worse is that I felt like someone slapped me in the face.

I quickly looked that the things in my bed and found the shoes that I used as a pillow was covered with dried blood... the blood from my fucking pimples!!!

As I looked at my shoes in horror, my pimples open up and blood came out of it, and it did not came out normally.

The blood came out like a 'speech bubble' you see in comic books, and it came out really slow and really thick.

I could have swear I can feel what its like to lose some blood! I got scared so I went to the toilet to washed up!

And then, I went to the living room, told my mother and my brother what happened and my brother said its just normal - weird...

I was scared! And at the same time, I was thinking how embarrassing it would be if one of my friends or maybe one of the the girls I like saw that 'speech bubble of blood!'

All of a sudden, I am suddenly outside an interesting club, I walked in, but made sure I had tissues with me so when that speech bubble of blood tries to come out - I'd block it! Its my blood I can't waste it!

A few minutes into the club scene, I found myself entertaining, or should I say flirting, actually 'seducing' is the right term... I found myself seducing one of my girl friends, she's not my type, but she's smart, I love that!

I don't know what happened but after a long fun conversation we had, she all of a sudden, sat next to a guy friend of ours and chatted with him instead.

"Hmm..." I thought to myself "OMG... you're trying to make me jealous, you're not even hot!"

I figured that if the guy bored her to death she would find me more attractive.

So I decided to talk to one of our girl friends whose really hot, but then again, she's not my type! But she's hot! I'll go out with her for the night!

As I was talking to my hot friend, I shared her tiny 'sofa chair' and she all of a sudden kissed me... with tongue... she's pretty good... not all women kisses this good.... (For the girls that think they're that good - trust me you'd be embarrassed at how good she is. You'll feel like an underage girl, if you know what I mean!)

Anyway... it was a good kiss but it was really an unexpected one. So when she stopped, I decided to get my revenge! So I gave her an unexpected kiss after her kiss...

And by the way, we did this in front of the girl I was flirting with earlier... you know the smart one... so hmm... she saw it... up close and uncensored!

Then my sexy friend decided she likes me, so she stood up and went to the bar to buy me a drink!

I looked at my smart friend, the one that I originally was flirting with and right before I said anything.

She pointed at me and said...

"...DON'T YOU FUCKING THINK ABOUT IT!!!"

and then I woke up....

Do you think that means anything at all?...

The Secret Art

To Thine Own Self Be True...